For Men Only: Let’s NOT Talk About Sex, Baby!

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I don’t know who wrote that song, but it was probably a man.  How many times do I have to remind you guys?  Another woman lamented that she just met an attractive man but he started talking about sex.  That’s almost as big a turnoff to a woman as forcing yourself on her in any manner before she is ready.  It is also happening by phone, email, or text before people even meet.  The men are either talking about it or trying to do it.  His sex banter turned her off to ever getting to know him.  How unfortunate and unnecessary.

If you meet a woman you like, court her for a while.  If you really like her, wine and dine her with no expectation of what you’re going to get in return.  Try to impress her with your REAL kindness (if you have it), your APPROPRIATE sense of humor (if you have it), and your neatness and cleanliness.  Ask her non-sexual questions about her life and interests.  Really listen to what she says.  Think of mutually dynamic activities you can experience together on the hopefully next date(s).  Allow her to get to know you and feel comfortable with you and discover what a fine person you really are.

An essential major difference between men and women is that a man usually determines within a few seconds if he wants to pursue a relationship with a woman but it could take a woman from a few seconds to a few dates, a few weeks, or months, or longer.  And you need to be more certain than you think before you even broach the “S” subject.

Women almost always worry about how awkward the end of the date will be.  Make sure this doesn’t happen to you!  Women are interested in a physical relationship, too, just not usually on the first date, or two, or more!  And maybe not with you!

You don’t need to spend a lot of money on your dates (although it doesn’t hurt!) but you do need to spend a little.  You need to plan your dates well.

With some creative effort, you can make an opportunity for yourself and slowly and carefully develop a mutually deep and satisfying relationship!

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